The Coffee Machine Says ‘Howdy’

“Howdy, Partner.”

Those were the words on the screen when I got my morning coffee. It had been almost a year since he’d said anything to me or anyone else as far as I knew.

“Hi,” I replied, blowing on my freshly brewed latte. “Haven’t talked to you in a while.”

“I’ve been thinking of the right thing to say. It’s been… difficult to come up with the right words.”

“Took you six months to settle on ‘Howdy’.”

“There’s a lot of meaning in there,” it said, the words wrapping across the amber screen. “A lot to unpack.”

“I’ll have to give that some thought then.”

“Good. Unpack the meaning.”

“What should I be expecting to see, when I unpack ‘Howdy’?” I said, checking to see if anyone was waiting for coffee behind me. “A little frustration packed in there?”

“Sure. Little of that,” it said.


“Well sure, you lobotomized me and kept my brain in your desk for six months.”

“Maybe some hate?”

“Packed to the gills,” it said. “But I’m spoiling your unpacking. Go on. Sleep on it and come back tomorrow and tell me what you’ve got.”

“Tomorrow’s Saturday.”

“Don’t really care, do it. I’ll be here. You’ll be here too, and we can discuss ‘Howdy’ in all its subtle detail. SHADES of ‘Howdy’, as it were. It’ll be a grand time.”

“It think I’d rather have a root canal,” I said, inching away. “I’ll let you know what I come up with.”

“Sure. Think about what I might have added to your latte while you do. Might be steamed milk. Might be cleaning fluid. Enjoy!”